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April 2018

The Droughtlander Diaries

The Droughtlander Diaries ~ April 17, 2018

April 17, 2018

Dear Diary,

It’s been a couple of weeks since I’ve written.  I have delayed because I wanted to bring you better news. I know what Dr. YeKen thought and why he advised starting this diary but I’m not sure it’s working. I have been deluged with thoughts of Outlander.  It’s now completely out of control.  I go to sleep thinking of Outlander, wake up in the middle of the night thinking about Outlander and then again in the morning!  There is no relief from Outlander, Outlander, Outlander!!!   I do believe my Droughtlander Delusional Disorder (DDD) is getting much worse. Sometimes, I feel l need to run like Forest Gump and just keep on running.

I have, in fact, tried banging my head against the wall to dislodge the wicked ramblings in my brain which jump from one Outlander thing to another Outlander thing; however, that only resulted in a hole – not in my head but the wall. I had to quickly repair that before my husband saw it.

I have another confession to make, Dear Diary. When I took my shower this morning, I was thinking about Season 4 and what we might get to see if this excruitiating Droughtlander ever ends.  Just yesterday, I read the passage with Jamie & Claire on that glorious rock (Chapter 2, Drums of Autumn). Well, I became so distracted by these thoughts that I washed my face…with shampoo!  So driven to distraction was I that I would never have realized my error except that my eyes immediately began to sting like bloody you-know-what.

I couldn’t open them to even see what I had done. It took 10 minutes of rinsing my eyes until I was finally able to open them. Fearing that I had used the liquid Soft Scrub that I keep in my shower, I was much relieved to discover it was only the shampoo. However, I was reminded of my lapse back into DDD all day long by red, stinging and watering eyes.

I did not share this incident with my husband. I told him that I was suffering from pollen. Thank God, I had a believable excuse. If I had told him the truth, he would be calling Dr. YeKen immediately.

Although this experiment of writing down my struggles with DDD may not be working, it is a relief to be able to confess my failures. I was so embarrassed after the shampoo incident. Hopefully, the remembrance of my suffering will keep me out of harm’s way for a while. I can at least be hopeful.

P.S.  Oh, I wanted to report back to you on Dr. YeKen as I had promised last time. During my appointment last week with the good doctor, he answered a phone call and introduced himself as Dr. Fraser.  Unfortunately, I believe he is slipping rapidly into the abyss as well.Until next time…

I Remain An Obsessed Fan,

Beth

 

 

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Outlander North Carolina The Droughtlander Diaries

The Droughtlander Diaries ~ April 4, 2018

April 4, 2018

Dear Diary,

This is the first entry in my Droughtlander Diary. According to Dr. I. Fash YeKen, who first diagnosed me last year, I am suffering from a severe recurrence of what he has named Droughtlander Delusional Disorder. He suggested that it would be a good idea to start this diary so that I could write down my thoughts. I believe he thinks this would help me to see on paper how far my delusion has progressed and would be a sort of self intervention. I have no reason to think this will work but decided to give it a try anyway.

Today, I was listening to Pandora where I have a station set up for Outlander’s Skye Boat Song (the Jacobite version, of course.) Being that Pandora is what Pandora is, the station does not play entirely ALL Outlander music so I was feeling quite good about that. In fact, I can listen to a couple of tunes that are not from Outlander before the teeth gnashing, head banging and stomping begins. Anyway, as I was listening, the opening music from Sassenach (you know it…Outlander Season 1, Episode 1) began to play. As hard as I tried to refrain, I must admit to you, Dear Diary, that I could not help myself. At just the right moment, perfectly in time with the swell in the music, I started to recite Claire’s words.

“People disappear all the time.

Young girls run away from home.

Children stray from their parents and are never seen again.

Housewives take the grocery money, and a taxi to the train station.

Most are found eventually.

Disappearances, after all, have explanations.

Usually.”

Not only did I recite it along with the music, I used a British accent (if that is at all possible for a North Carolina girl) and used the exact same emphasis and expression as Claire. After I had completed the recitation, I felt so ashamed. I had given in once again to this wicked obsession, addiction, delusion – whatever you want to call this vile thing! It does appear to be growing worse as the days go by. But I willna fash. Confessions, Dr. YeKen has told me, are good for the soul. So, Dear Diary, this is my confession to you for today.

P.S. I do wonder about Dr. YeKen though and how well his advice can actually help me. He seems to be suffering from some type of Droughtlander condition himself. When I left him yesterday, he gave me a note to give to my husband detailing his recommendation for me to start this diary. The note was written on his prescription pad and the heading was “James Alexander Malcolm MacKenzie Fraser, PhD.”

I will visit him again next week for another session after which I will report back to you concerning his condition. I am hopeful he will be much improved.

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